My mind is blank,
Hands stilled against the keys
And my heart quiet,
Patient for...
An idea.  

Innocent Blood Called My Name

Innocent blood
Out of silence
Called my name
Saying "Life, liberty, and happiness,
Justice for the blameless
Justice for the nefarious."  

I wept when I thought about the millions upon millions
Of dead children laying upon each other in dumpsters
Across the United States,
Land of the free and home of the brave
Is this what you have come to?
Is this your compromise nation of blessings?

I weep when I think that in this instant
There is, at our hands an unborn dying infant
Quiet, unnoticed cries for a savior silenced, our voices, dormant. 
I weep when I think that in this instant
There is, at our guilty hands an unborn dying infant
And that our voices lie dormant. 

Innocent blood out of silence
Called my name

Saying
"Life, liberty, and happiness"  

This Gift

He's got this gift
That he doesn't use
It just sites on the shelf growing old from lack of use
He can't give it back he can't refuse
But the time he doesn't use
It's burning down it's a burning fuse.

He points a finger at himself, accuse,
Why God, did you give this to me?
It can't be
I'm not the one for phophecy
I"m not the one to be carrying
All this weight for the sake of Your truth.     

I wanna hear Your voice
Then I pray "don't speak"
I'm terrified of the choice
To make to proclaim it or retreat.

I pray for You to speak it
But then I run from it
It's chasing me down
I can't get away
It's always at my door
I know it's Your face.


He's got this gift
That he can't resist
It just attacks his mind
From all sides
Making him cry inside
But he knows it's all for a purpose
He just can't imagine why.

My Secrets

Press your palms
Against mine--
Feel the flaws
Of time
And know
I to you, resign. 

And baby 
I'm forgetful and Easily distracted
Many things for me lie detracted--
But not your eyes which
Plunge the depths
Of my heart,
You just know me
With your gaze.

Listen to my heart
Hear the pause
Between the beats-- 
Hear the breaks
Between my breaths--

And for you
I'll be honest with someone
But only for love's sake,
You're the one for truth to be given
But only from me
And that's why it's so precious,
Listen to my secrets. 

Press your palms
Against mine--
Feel the flaws
Of time
And know
I to you, resign. 

Pro-Self Choice

"It's my life!" adamant
Say that, your babe sure can't
"It's my life!" obdurate
My knife my babe negate   

"It's my body!" discreet
Say that, your boy toy feels it,
"It's my body!" exclusively
While the seed of your womb dies for lustful avidity--

Pro-self choice
Women's rights voice
Unborn infants got no choice
Unborn infants got no voice!

I walk beneath a
Stricken sky that's holding clouds
On the painter's easel.


  

Remember the days
When you and I
Were in love under a lie?
I lose reality amongst
The memories
Piled high in the catacombs of my mind,
I would tuck them away
But my heart couldn't bear it.
 

 

Strings

Love tied a string around my heart
And won't let me go--
I tried to run, escape, but.
Passion tightens when pulled
She tugs it every now and then
Reminding me 
Of her control
Of her hold
Of something long past
I deeply dream to be.     

What can I say
About my abuse of a gift?
Only a fool
Doesn't use a tool
For what the giver
Had given it for,
Only I, the fool
Would throw down
A divine award
For my own.

    

How can a man
Live every day
Being this way?
His mind a trap
And his mouth a fool
He spews intention
Yet never does
He boasts loudly
Of his greatness
And never has been.  

Time has stopped
Someone unplugged the clock,
So now I'm getting older
Just without a ticking
And a tock.

   

To Write

To write
Is a dream
Slowly slipping
From my finger tips,
I scream and claw
Trying to hold on
But, it escapes me.
To write
Is a sad romance
Falling apart
In the black of the night,
Unseen trauma playing out
Before my eyes.
To write
Is the sun
Descending out of site
Abandoning me
To the cold.  

I sit
And stare,
The sky is high
And deeply blue.
The sun
Compliments the hue,
Vastly in love and
Vibrantly alive--
Steal my breath today.  
 

Naught but regret
Have I now seen that
You are the queen
Of lies and deceit. 

These Breezes (Haiku)

These breezes of Spring
Carry naught but you--my heart's
Loss, at my heart's cost.   

We are the Ones

We are the chosen ones
In a land of lies and lost identities
Where everyone thinks themselves God
And no one, not one thinks themselves not--
We are the ones who are depended upon
By our creator to save one another
And there simply isn't room for our desire--
We are the ones plagued by our lusts
But destined by salvation for victory
We are the perfect saints running an imperfect race
And we are the ones who will fight our flesh
Until our day of death--
We are the loved ones
But can we hate ourselves with such an intensity--
We are the ones who do not comprehend
The passion that carried Christ to the cross--
We are the chosen ones
By God to accept His love
And we are the ones who the day we forget it
No longer are truly living it.  

Dream a Dream

Close your eyes
And think of me,
Lay to sleep and
Let your mind run deep--
And let your thoughts
Draw closer to mine,
Don't fret over
You and I--we aint no crime
Let your hand
Fall into mine
Just this time--dare to
Dream a dream, 
A dream
Of you and I.

Why they don't give justice to the poor
And to the plain.
The peasants living in the street don't complain.  

Wrapping up their bloodied feet
In dirty clothes used and old a week.  
Tying down the finances
With some old fashioned labor,
Half a dollar for the day
To tie down the hunger until
Tomorrow morn they pray

Azure Sea

Today is a nice day.
Perky clouds and
White fluff floating
And drifting through an azure sea--
It's so deep, the sky that is.
I could stare forever
And ever.

I Resign

Remember when we danced across the floor
Scuffing black marks across the glossy wood
Pressing our palms together--
That was the last time. 

That night.  Oh the regret!
Scant chance I will forget,
And oh! Such scars naught time abate,
In my memories you await. 

And this is another sleepless night thinking of you

Crying for what I couldn't do--
Darling, please forgive me
For not being enough for you.

I remember
Your hand in mine
For the last time--
I cry, then into

The night
I resign.

What I Want

I can't just sit down
And write,
It has to come as a flow
And as a smooth thing--
If I chop it up to analyze
It won't write. 
So I just write.
I try not to fix it
Or change it as I go
It's not true inspiration
If it's different from imagination.
If it's not from my contemplation
It's just not real.
It's not poetry.
So. I just write it out
And put it down
On that page
Without a doubt that its
Exactly what I want it to be. 

It hurts to know
You deserve nothing.
Even though the Father died
Your father thinks you nothing,
When I walk through the door
Into my home
I am walking through a door
I know I cannot escape from,
Come to my room
And see me struggle--
The pain the past
The shame the vast, oh so vast
Emptiness the slowly
Swallows my heart,


It's so dark now.
And I can't see,
So dark.

Now it's just me in my room
Waiting for the tempter to take a seat
Next to my ear
And begin to whisper--I fear
That what I am
Doesn't deserve the life he has.

I know what it is
To be in the pit.
I know what it is
To see Satan
Take me under.  

It hurts to know
You deserve nothing.
Even though the Father died
My own father thinks me nothing. 

No More

Regrettably unforgettable
Are you my love--
You were, beautiful. 

Tearfully whispering "no" short and cold
Over the phone--"no more".

Days Like Today

The memories never completely go away
And days with grey rain I sit
And think too much of yesterday.


 




 

Not Enough

My lips utter a single
Sad note--ringing in the pale
Light then die,
The note that ticks
Through my head is that
"I'm not enough"
And oh do I know 
That I am not--I know very well
Of what I'm dying of,
In the darkness of my heart
I will not let you see
Lest you see what my heart
Pumps through my veins. 
 
   

Immeasurable (Photo Response)

A face in tears and
A daughter held tight--I tried
But her heart gave into the night. 

Unfathomable
Loss--Immeasurable
Unimaginable.
To understand
I'm unable.     
   

Last Chance to Take

What you need
Is the truth 
No more lies
And deceit,
You gotta stop
Telling your heart
To forget the hurt
And the defeat,
Give it up
For yourself
For your sake
Last chance to take.

After Jesus was butchered
At the cross for us could you
Betray him by saying"Your
Sacrifice wasn't enough"? 

After God suffered
At the hands of your sin
Could you tell him
"Your Son was an insufficient fund"?    

Untitled

The sky holds hope for
My heart but it's not enough
To keep my eyes
Lifted up.   

Beautiful Love

Without you I would utterly fail
And without your sacrifice
I would die a lost loveless child
Consumed by a ravenous world,
Without your love I would be
Worthless and lacking purpose
Until the hopeless end
When I would fall into despair
Out of mind and care.  

Oh mother how do you
Sacrifice so much
For a child who scorns
Your love?
Oh mother how do you never fail
I who cannot listen or respect
You who deserves it most? 
Oh mother how do you provide me
With exactly what I need
Daily? 
Oh mother you lead
By exemplary example
And live holy and righteous
For me to follow and see. 

To lay down my heart mind
And life for your hand
Wouldn't be a choice
Or obligation,
Sacrificing my desires
For you wouldn't be
Paining for reason of regret
But a privilege,
For a heart so beautifully
Down layed
And a love so selflessly
Lived for me,
For you
I would my life
Gladly give.   

Oh Winter!

Rain!  Oh the rain!  It
Seems you are quite taken with
Me, But why oh why
Can't you let me be?

Grey!  Oh the grey!
It seems you are quite taken with
This day, the sky forest floor
And every face.  But grey!
Enough I say!  But grey
You say more, more more!

Ice!  Clinging to my face and
Biting your toes,
Nipping your ears and
And cutting your strides short. And ice!
But ice!  You won't take me
Down with you, cold I am
But deftly stepped too. 

Not One

Have I forgotten
The sting of
Your love? My heart's
Sadness
No longer
Intensifies
Or heightens
But lessens

Have I let you Go?
Heart to be
Taken with the
Wind and
Tainted sky
Flown away, gone.
No one knows
Not one. 

I've Been Waiting

You told me you'd come
But I've been waiting
For oh so long--
But I've been waiting for oh so long
You told me I wasn't going to be alone
Because that's what I am
Lost in the world without a hand to hold
Or a God to call upon as I was told
To whom I belong. 

I've been waiting for
For a life time
For a promise
For you my friend
But you never came
In my hurt and pain
As if to you
My life to you
Is just some game.