Why?

What would a father
Say to his murdered babe
If he had to explain?
And what would a father
Say to God if God asked
Why?  

(Untitled)

I am embarking
To the land of mystery--
Where I know not of  
Anything,
And all the while
I am possessed by
the idea.

Summer's Sleep

I’m venturing past the
Warmth and out the door
To see a new land which is composed
Of mainly white,
My steady step
Upsets Sir December’s alabaster bed sheets
That he used to put Summer to sleep, and as
I sigh past another
Crisp breath
The Bitter air
Takes advantage of me and
Nibbles at my lips.

Heart

A bitter cold gale
Is biting my face, and
Though I trudge through the
Bleakest night
A warm light flooding
The dark
Draws me
Closer and closer
To its heart.

Every Time, Every Day

Every time
Every day,
Escaping seems father away
To me
And you,
Brilliantly yellow bee
You are the epitome of
Young life’s innocence
And joy,
Always flying away
Into a blue cloudless sky,

Though a small boy escapes everyday from
Our nightmares we are
Held captive by depression
Forever.

How? (Haiku)

How can I express

My pains to you, how can I

Expect you to know?

To Be (Haiku)

To be close to you

Is only but a fragile

Whisper in my dreams.

Losing You

Losing you is more
Than I can bear,
And my heart breaks
Again and again
At the thought of the end.

Wild Ocean

Wild beast
Uncontrollably flailing
And tossing
Everything that rides upon it,
Smoother than glass
And as deep blue as
Your eyes,
Carelessly throwing yourself
Into my arms and then melting away
Into yourself again,
The ocean is you,
And you are the ocean.

Fakers

Spare me the tragedy
Of fake friendship,
Were you and I designed to be hurt by lies?
And am I prepared to kill with words?
I can’t take the brokenness,
Don’t make me cry.

Tongue

The tongue, an unwieldy
Weapon,
The killer of many
Innocents,
And the death of me.

Seeking You

I’m searching for the

Transcendental rose,

Yet, have I found you?

Ticking Down

All good times must pass

Into dust and memories,

When I leave this place

I will see you no more

And this friendship will dissolve

Away in the rains of time,

All these days of dancing in the sun

With just you

Are ticking down faster than you or I know,

Time is a funny thing,

You may have much time,

As much time as October’s colored leaves,

But when November’s bitter wind blows

Your time leaves you to join the sky,

Your time betrays you

To loss and despair

Which drain me,

I have little time left with you

All our joy will soon be

Gone.

Push me Away

I can’t say what I want

And I can’t tell you what I feel,

You may understand

Or, you may not,

Yet, if were the words of my mind spoken

You would surely push me away.

Rose

I behold the glorious rose,

Its petals are red in the summer light

And its aroma wafts through cool terraces,

Rose, you are true beauty.

Tongue

The tongue, an unwieldy

Weapon,

The killer of many

Innocents,

And the death of me.

Pain (Haiku)

Tears of pain line our
Faces, life is mocking us
For our foolishness.

No-Sense

There are simple ways to say things,

Yet for the interpretation of my ponderings, there exists a complex method,

Is a boy wrong for speaking simply?

For though his words simple, his thought profound,

Or -- nonsense spewingly spluttering from his mouth, he is a geyser of foolish gayety,

Absolutely youthful, utterly young,

Helplessly boyish.

Haiku (No title)

People of God, rise

Up with roaring defiance

And see Satan quake.

Haiku (No title)

This nation has screamed

Rebelliously into the

Face of father God.

Haiku Baby

I can’t understand

Why I’m so stuck,

I’m stuck in the writing blob,

What, you may ask, is that?

And to be quite honest with you

I have no idea.

I’m just stuck.



Maybe I’ll break out from my mind prison

Soon to be joined in marriage with my Haiku baby,

I can’t wait for the day,

When I see her face

And her sweeping hair draping over my paper quietly

Whispering peace of mind.



Why am I so stuck, in this state of mind?

Pacing the floor looking for the perfect adjective

And noun,

I’m laying on the couch thinking of days

When I felt emotion,

A silent tear stains

my cheek as I remember,

What it used to be.

Break Away

Where did my young days fly to?

And what did my mother say to me, the day I left?

Her hard voice still haunts my nights, and her foreboding steps ring

In my mind,

Why didn’t I run?

Why?

I bitterly break myself

With my own ill will

Again and again,

I hate myself for who I am.



I had a dream last night,

There lay before me a massive plain,

A battlefield covered with the dry bones of dead enemies,

Yet there was one standing man,

It was me,

The last standing foe, between me,

And freedom.





Cold floor nights

Spent regretting

My life

Every night,



The young can still break away.

I am gone.

Empty

I have a quiet

Mind, only whispers flutter

Through saying “hi, bye”.

Gone (Haiku)

Beautiful loveless

Babes died today, murdered by

Mother’s guilty hand.

Remembrance

Man,

How joyful a reminiscence it is,

Of one's past wife.

Yet still, it can draw tears

And awaken deep sleeping strife.

November Pearl

As I stood alone, against a bitter

November wind,

Eyes of mine, stared longingly after a train tearing away into the night,

Far from reach,

My coat flapped

Throwing my cold tears

Into the air,

As if I giving them to wind to take away,

My gray face mirrored the sky,



I wish my love to be home,

I remember when I saw her eyes gleaming with joy,

And her beautiful smile dance into view, her white smile,

She was my pearl.





Snow was gliding down, white snow,

It was beautifully white, so carefree,

Only to land and be stained by mud ridden ruts,

Was not this our lives?

I wished my love to be home,

And knew not her face,

Anymore.

Fire (Haiku)

Humanity soon

Will be shocked by fiery

Judgment, earned by sin.

Mice and Lions (Haiku)

An innocent mouse,

Can grow into a lion,

Given the right food.

Vulnerable (Haiku)

We sit together

With closed eyes, and not a care,

As death stalks our hearts.

Letters, Versus Emotion

He motioned with a curious finger,

I believe his index,

Towards a 7 letter set,

And questioningly glanced at us, seeking approval from our scrutinizing eyes

To start, and as the authoritative nod was given, it was as if

The beautiful beginning of man’s God given life again newly sprouted,

His mind, a green baby shoot flying into a blue sky, seeking freedom from words, and to only

Speak in emotion, but alas, for only were to his keeping 7 pitiful letters,

And yet, though this barrier, his

7 Black letters danced creatively away between his fingers,

Off to create wonders,

From simply, that 7 letter set.

Poppy Seed Astronauts

Pop off the lid and watch the show,

As poppy seed sprinkles playfully dance across my table,

Miniature astronauts all cheerily zipped up,

In bright white suits that make us wondrously mutter to one another,

We watch in awe as

They zoom carelessly towards

A carefree drop, all

Joyfully bouncing away from earth

Searching for freedom.

Autumn

The wind is tossing golden leaves,

Into a crisp blue sky,

And the grey old men who once stood tall, are humbled,

While the cold joyfully plucks their pride

One color at a time.

Yellow

The pencil equals man's primary writing utensil,

All the letters and numbers

did he stencil,

With his trusty yellow pencil.

Green

There he goes again, down

Main Street with his usual swagger,

In all of his egotistical self love

Does he haughtily grin at the world,

Lackadaisically he dons a pair aviator shades

And straightens out the V-neck,

Where the glasses tugged down

And caused a gentle wrinkle in the jet black cotton,

His stride slightly thrown by the new, unbroken blue jeans,

Which go with the green shoes,

And the bright white laces holding it all together.

Sleeping Beauty

There it sits, where I left it,
Not used even by the magicians fingers,
And not tickled by a child searching for fun
On a boredom day,
As the ivory silently plays weeping ballads, dust falls
Upon the golden wood and jet black keys that once sang
In the name of beauty.

Boredom Boy

Boredom Boy

Stood blank facedly placid, staring

Professionally into empty space while wondering,

When the time will have flown by enough for him to escape

His monotonous prison

The Desk

There was desk in a white house

Where papers grew from the gleaming finished surface

Which like a shy child, would peek out from underneath

A flowered cloth, that was sloppily draped over him in a rush,

Yet, only to the child’s dismay was he tucked back under, everyday,

Every time,

He attempted a peek,

And many a day would he dwell on the oppressing thought that,

That old flowered cloth, and all those papers,

Would always conceal his

Beauty.

Smarty Smug Sniffy

Here we have the odd one reading what he states to be,

A text book,

Or so he says it to be,

And what a demeanor of uppity boy does he declare the notsoamazing happenings

Of his book worm life,

Who in this school needs to read, but him?

“No one!” I answer with the usual swagger,

(Door opens to my office and my friend inquires)

“How did you do on that test?”



Weellll, as you probably know, I, uhh, failed, the test...



So how would my swift witty tongue reply?

“That is confidential information, please don’t ask about

My personal grades”.

Thinker Boy

He crossleggedly poses in the brown rocker while wearing the face of The Thinker

Pondering equations that Einstein didn’t get,

And when stumped his great mind is, he states the ask “what the heck?!”



Ouch!



Sorry for the interruption, I’m not accustomed to being

Struck by crumpled paper, covered with careful, yet miscalculated thoughts

That are not, what he thought them to be.

Water Never Tasted So Good

Water never tasted so good, especially

After pressing through a wall of density

And pressure,

All your strength strained to the test

Up against something hard,

Something hard like life,

Life is a wall that we slam up against,

And it hurts,

Jesus’ water never tasted so good.

Glove Box

Cassette tapes in the

Glove box, are memories that

Age, that serve shelf time.

There was a Man

There was a Man who lived for man,

Man, who deserved to die,

There was a Man who cried because of the burden, for loveless lambs, and

There was a Man who loved, more than any man could,

And there was a man, who suffered beyond what I could stand,

There was a Man who was whipped to death’s edge,

And then pushed over, by the very men he was dying for,

Four spikes to pin his limbs, and while innocent blood spurted out and splattered,

Against the pitiless dirt,

They rammed down against his brow a cutting crown,

That man, then died, he died

For us, and the dirty perversion that we love,

There was a Man, who loved man his whole life,

More than his own life,

That Man lives again, and is fighting

For your life, because

You will die,

Without Him,

At your side.

Mid-Night Supper

There is a man,

That is haunting the dark,

And when I’m sitting in the night,

I feel his falling footsteps, fall behind me,

I spin around, to find no one,

No One,

Is it a One, to start with?

Probably not,

The pitiless black that fills my vision

The night hides many men, from the light,

But does light reveal everything you could see,



In your short life, you live a short time,

So, I will

Make this short,

The shadow in the night that you create, is

Much harder to drive out with light,

Than the dark that wasn’t invited

For a mid night supper.

Unpoetically

Sometimes I try to write,

And sometimes I try

To think,

Not just think,

But think about what to write, I say try because I try,

But can’t think, like a man who can’t stand his own,

Or like the women who can’t bear a child,

The boy who fights for respect,

And the girl who doesn’t have a friend,

Failure at being great, hurts,

But, I guess it’s not my fault that I’m not great,

Or maybe I didn’t do what was right, at that pivotal moment,

And ruined my potential,

I take pauses throughout my writing,

To get new ideas,

And wait, for them to come, they usually do,

Usually,

I like to stand at the wide open water, and think about things

No one thinks about,

My mind is a box with dark corners,

That always light up a little more every day,

I can ramble unpoetically, like right now,

I like making up words, and

Though you may say it’s not fair game, you get my point, right?

Of course you do, you’re an understanding young person,

Or maybe not so young,

And you feel the weathering of life, wearing you down,

Well, make up a word,

And laugh

To live,

A little more.

Left for Me

I can’t say what I want to say to you,

I will, in a letter, sometime soon, but for now

Try and understand,

For now with these words, I know,

A poor compensation,



I hate

this feeling I find,

It lives in my life, and clasps my mind,

We may fight against the tearing of our lives a part, But to no avail,

Like a part of me flown away by you, into an unreachable place,

And you, a part of you taken by I,

That I will keep,

And treasure,

Forever.

Forseeable Pain

You know the feeling you get,

When you're torn from a friend,

You're both are parting ways, and you both have different lives,

I get a tearing emotion, that wrecks me,

You are gone, and I will never see you again.

Is it almost worth it, not to make a friend?

Better not throw yourself, into foreseeable pain,

And not make a friend.

Door

When I walk down the hall, towards the door,

Memorized patterns play out in order,

And I know what will happen

When I open that door,

That white door, covered with paper,

Splotched paper that says what I think,

Says what I thought,

The door gives way when I press,

And I enter the dark the lurks in that room,

At the end of the hall, where

My thoughts prowl,

And that door, that's covered in splotched

Paper.

Connotations

Life,
A word that has connotations,
Live,
Something, that you must
Do,
Did you and I, have a choice?
Was the must to die, picked by my father as a child?
The fool, for he was no child in body, only in
Soul,
Life,
A word that doesn’t express,
What it really means.

The Pains, The Struggles

I can’t take the struggle, I can’t take the pain,

I don’t understand why I must endure life, And all of Its hurts,

There is no one who understands, who I am,

And there is no one, who thinks of me as friend,

Every relationship, I break,

And every person, hates,

I can’t go into the streets, without crushing depression,

And unnecessary struggle against something,

I Don’t even understand,

People I meet, don’t want to talk to me,

Because I am repulsive, and don’t have anything,

To offer,

Sunk down so deep into the mud, I’ll never, never escape,

And my whole life,

Will be wasted trying to get away,

From the pain, that I can’t take,

And the struggle, that I won’t win

Wanting Cry It Out

An awkward stance, is what I’ve taken up towards you,
And it was nice, our pre-loss friendship,
But you declared a break of my thoughts,
And snapped the thing holding the balance,
I feel I am betrayed, or that I’m the betrayer?
I don’t what this life is supposed to feel like,
And I try to get it right, but only end up hurting myself,
And crying out the pain,
Crying it out into the night,
And the one thing I must say to you that I can’t,
Is
Please stop hurting us.

Seasons

Seasons come and go
During my life that injure me,
Again and again

Hard

There is a day, when a man finds out who he really is,
And there is a day, when a man, learns the hard way,
The way a man changes, is hard,
I almost can’t stand it, the impossibility of it all,
It’s just so hard sometimes, that I want to give up,
There is a day, when a man learns he is a sinner,
And there is a day, when a man is crushed by the knowledge,

This life is so broken,
And so am I,
Like a twisted scene of death, is my sin to you,
This life is hard, and
There is a day when a man looks in the mirror,
And says,
Is this, who I’m going to be, for the rest of my life?

Jungle

The world is embraced by a jungle that swallows
Everything that enters it,
And if a man isn’t careful,
He becomes an animal, that lives there,
I imagine, one in each hand,
The man, and in the other,
The creature,
And they seem so similar, in their actions, and in the emotions,
The man has a drive to survive, as does the dog,
And a snake, isn’t afraid to bite, at the loss of others,
The man, a ravaged beast, that wearily crouches, an instinct gained from experience,
His face covered by the dark, and his heart is like the unreachable,
And this is what I fear,
To become a part of the jungle, and become as death,
My deepest terror,
Is that I will become an animal,
In the jungle.

Face

I, I am the person who doesn’t get it right,
And you are someone important,
At least more than me anyways,
As I go and look at myself,
I say,
"I can’t be one of them, for I’m weak,"
Weak spirited, and weak willed,
And this face of mine
Is the face of loss,
Is the face of an unbidden gift of grace,
Is the face of pain,
And this is the face, that I can’t stand,
On my face there is a brand,
“This is not what God planned”
I will never live to my potential,
This is the face,
That tears run down, because,
That face, can’t even help itself.

Double Click

It’s like a double take, a double click,
When you’re thinking one thing, an instant past you think different,
I can win now I can’t,
And I’m stunned from the change in the supposed, self made plans,
The passion previous to the change, dust, and
The ideas that switch sides, every day, switching swishing tides,
Are the pressing struggles,

I want to be better, at this, this thought conveying process,
And once I thought, that I wouldn’t be this,
This last night’s nightmare,
Terror to myself,
Or just new? Still getting used to

My life being a double take, and a prolonged day of changed minds,
And when I switched, to the thought of peace,
A crash of tumbling boxes cracked open my head,
And out spilled ideas, that were red with gore,
And the very look of them, was revolting,
That is what I thought, of myself, and the world,

Before that double click,
Before that double take thought.

Children Throwing Stones

I have lots breaking down my mind,
And many spinning ideas, and thoughts tricking me,
Like children throwing stones in the dark at me,
I scare off the boys and girls, with a yell and a wave,
Like I write away my wearing worries,
I write away the things, on my mind,
To bring a temporal peace,
Temporal.

Limbo

Why are we captivated by each other?
And why are our minds, focused on that one?
How could I, get stuck in the muck?
There are many bewitched minds, struggling to break away from bondage,
Always struggling, the mind is of old age,
You are the one, who is gazing out at her,
And you can’t help yourself, if only,
If only, you never got into mud in the beginning,
Now you’re too deep, for an easy exit,
The dark, it has hexed it, poor relationship,
Poor souls, stuck in a limbo, till they depart,
Poor me, it’s a sad sentence that I speak,
A pathetic sentence, dripping of helpless mewling,
Oh, I forgot,
I like being stuck in the muck, well,
Sometimes I like it, tomorrow
Pull me out.
Gently.

Life's Ride

I really don’t know if I can,
I don’t know if I can, all the way there,
It’s such a long way,
The ground is scalding, and the air thick,
And a hot wind is blowing against me,
Each step is a struggle, with each ragged breath
My chest hurts more, my legs beg for reprieve, and
Sweat is pouring off me,
The journey is long,
Pressing on.

Not a Poet, Just the Clearer of My Mind.

I think I’m done, saying what needs to be said,
Thoughts vented, and a new thought on my heart,
Singular and pure,
Driven to the point,
Sending vibrations through my skull,
That make me think more,
I am fascinated with the mind,
I can’t feel like I need to stop talking,
But I can’t,
And when the world comes against me,
I call for aid,
When it comes, I want to know,
If I got the aid or not,
When those men make music,
I want to it like them,
But I can’t,
Because I am uselessly helpless,
Bring me higher.


Just trying to get out my thoughts,
Onto paper,
They don’t really mean anything,
Just things I’m saying,
Almost like a need, to vent,
Into the sky all my smoke,
It’s like a story, a sad story unraveling,
Almost like my life, is dying,
Away into the dust of men,
Can’t say what happens, in the end,
But the world needs a savior.



I cannot do it,
I am broken,
And smashed useless,
Only you, can save me,
From death,
Please, come down to my dirty pit of sin,
Cleanse me clean,
Straighten me mind,
I am nothing,
I am useless,
Without you.

The Burn of a Thought

It’s a thought, that beats through a mind,
It brings on a burn, that spurns an action,
Power of the action powers the beat, and the beat powers the mind,
Its sends me deeper into a trance, deeper from day, where my conscious lay,
Up high, in the sky, farther away, the farther I pry,
Farther down into the dark, is where we go,
Flight, we are like kites,
Deeper into the thought, that beats through a mind,
It brings on a burn, a churn,
Fly away.

Random Man

These are random words,
Works of nothing, how graceful do they pose, and I pose my pen roughly
To write, a random thought, like my own,
Is to scroll a mess, a mess that makes not much sense, even to the creating mind,
You need to have a random mind, to be like me,
Are you ready for the random land, that lives in my head?
Probably not, as you do not have a wild mind, like mine,
But if you weren’t ready,
Why are you reading still?

Sense?

Writing genius, clasp
Your amps, pin drop Silence please,
You, bitter sweetness.

Ramblings of a Wild Mind

I want a mind, of beautiful thoughts,
Intricate, different, will my ponderings be, at least
Different from their ideas,
They who can’t create, solve, differ, differ
From all the others,
New thoughts to the world, they will be
Something that gleams to a mans small mind,
And shines in his eyes, like the best prize,
The unique and never thought of thoughts, will grace my mind,
Scroll it onto a cloud, and let it fly, into the sky, as it gets
Carried away, into a pure blue horizon,
Like a spinning top, on a rampage,
Unique mind.

Think of

We can’t find a place to stay,
Staying on the safe side of life,
Are some of you,
Fight the good fight,
Win the hard hearts,
Break the gates down, and storm fiery prince’s palaces,
Victory is the goal,
Not happiness in life, if it takes that to win,
We should give, all,
The life in a our vanes for love,
For giving hope to the broken,
Loving the forgotten,
Saving the lost,
He saves the lost, when we take steps of faith, belief in the King,
Man is so empty,
God gave us a reason to live.

Where?

Where is humanity going?
Loss of heart, loss of love,
And broken spirit,
Young men live for young women,
And boys die to wake up their fathers,
What has humanity done?
Murdered millions of innocents for desire,
Scarlet lust,
Slaughtered like pigs at the butcher,
Are the babes of this age,
What is humanity thinking?
Live a godless life, and die a godless man,
And for what? Temporal pleasure, that fades away with the day,
Who are our leaders, to whom we give our love?
Who are our influences, that they overdose on cocaine for more, more
Is what their searching for, something, something that fills,
That satisfies,
Where are you going?
Do you know?
Where is humanity going?
Death.

Hollow Inside

Man is empty, an
Endless expanse that eats all,
And can’t be sated.

Rainy Mornings, Oh Rainy Mourning's

Rainy mornings and sunny afternoons, are like your life, with
A tang of guilt in your drink, spare a child,
Spare a dollar,
Win a soul, shoot an arrow,
Where are you going young man?
Think of a place to be, before you say,
Care of a boy,
Care of a man,
Cold shoots down your legs with icicle speed,
The only place to be, is in a coma, and when you’re a
Stopper of rubber, you can slow the progress of a killer blight,
Change when the son comes, and pour out tears of rain into beer,
When the night chill strikes,
Like a mosquito bite like a sudden death,
Are you and your morning mourning’s,
Spare the cup, and spare your life,
Rainy mourning’s and sunny afternoons.

Passing Beauty

A slow passing of a beauty, and the browning of spring’s leaves, it’s all
Changing into something of a wonder, with a slight calm, it’s that subliminal presence
That I’m so familiar with,
And it’s where I sleep into the morn,
While the dew slowly eases away from a kiss upon the grass, that shines in the dawn light,
Like a calm presence gracing my dreams,
And like a blanket of security draped over my head,
Oh, peaceful change that the dawn break brings.

I am, Nothing

Where does this dark end?
I can’t see light, nor can I pierce through to it,
No end to the suffering for me,
Sometimes, I think of what I could be,
And what we could be,
My life is fast passing, beautiful essence to faded counterfeit,
And then there’s you, perfect in the light,
A flawless face,
What am I?
Nothing.
I have nothing, and I have not the love, of your father,
I am nothing to you.

There is a Man

There is a man, who fights for the lives of many people,
Who defends them night and day, from the onslaught a roiling tide,
And he would rather die himself, than one of his own,
There is a man, who laid down himself, for the cause of a true Man,
Who gave up beautiful dreams, for the eternal light, and a forever dream,
He sweats over life, and grinds in the stone, to shape frameless children, into glorious paintings,
Glorious, Glorious, is the sight that he sees, a sight that only the Master could put into his mind’s eye,
His master knows, that this man, is a man, that will do what he must, he will do what he knows is right,
There is a man, who shows selfless love to loveless men, and gives truth and grace to the Godless,
And he will stop at nothing, to accomplish the greatest heights, and farthest distance,
For other people,
There is a man, who knows that every man can stumble, he is so very humble,
And can say he is wrong, when no man could,
There is a man, who dares to fight, against this present darkness, and is not afraid to step into empty air,
And take the step of faith, for his God, and his family,
He is my Father,
And I love him.

A Man

Joe, has the dough,
That makes this house go,
He flicks his toe, and I fly off to work,
Mowing the lawn, industrialization of the world, of the wild,
His wife, is his pearl, his girl,
His children make up the kingdom,
And the taskforce,
All of this behind his closed doors,
His days are spent teaching kids, all for family,
His evenings are teaching his kids, all for family,
His seconds, used wisely for good,
Him realizing, that they are numbered,
His life living for God.

Without You

I feel the tears coming, and your love cascading down,
Your love is my life,
No reason to live, without you,
No reason to love another but you,
I break down in worship,
I realize what you did for me, for humanity,
From the white, to trough,
To pay off our debt,
And for you to endure the pain,
Absorb the human stain,
Endless praise pours from me,
As I bow on bended knee,
I’ll never stop fighting for you,
Jesus,
Never.

Blue Boy

Young blue boy, flying through free air,
The slight breeze that carries him smells of summer,
And the warmth of the sun, comes from his skin,
All you people, toil behind screen doors, letting air in,
Break out of your prison, and follow the boy,
Who floats over and past fields of green,
This is a sun day, a breezy hair day,
A blue boy day.

Today

This glimpse of what we could have,
Is tempting a smile,
Or a maybe a laugh,
I thought of a day, when I was like this,
It was today,
It brought hope to me, hope for the future,
And hope that you, notice me.
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Stare

I stare at the faces, of all those people,
Those broken people, I, I don’t know what to do,
They are all so tired, forlorn faces stare into my eyes,
Straight faces fake the no pain game,
A bustle to the safety of their homes, the safety of,
Their jobs, family, money,
Addicts line the road, all looking for a fix,
Sunk in eyes, which scream out for reprieve,
I see a woman, with a tear streamed face, pain lines her grimace,
As she weeps into the phone, she begs for a reason,
A reason to live,
Small dirty man, stares at me,
I need food. or I will die,
They all ask,
Why was I born into this world of torture,
Just to die, and be thrown onto a pile of broken heart smashed men?
I weep tears for those people,
I sit in my chair, and sob,
You put this feel, in my heart,
Because I asked,
I will tell them, of you,
Thankyou.

Higher

Long was the fight, for life,
Broken life, and the struggle to survive,
Brought us higher, it brought us, above, this,
We know, we know that you know all,
Was it us?
Or, was it apart of your plan?
Will I ever know?
Work was done, and sweat was spilt,
You grew us higher, better,
You know all,
You’re higher,
Higher than all.

Simple

Simple, yet intricate,
Saying isn’t doing,
And with a flutter of thoughts, that lead to a start,
You think, what could I be, without this?
Then you falter, what could I be with it?
Thinking of ways, to be better, or,
Thinking of ways, to attract the eye,
What of it?
What matters is what we need,
And what doesn’t matter, isn’t needed,
Maybe wanted,
We will see what you think, when it comes to the test,
Simple yet intricate,
Saying isn’t doing,
I stand through your tests.

Rose

Rose of red,
Rose like ruby,
Rose of beauty,
Rose flower, smell and sigh,
Simply, life brings joy,
Give you a rose, see your face,
The price to pay, for a beautiful smile,
You see the simple joy too,
Give a rose, to me, I will smile,
And we can admire its artistry together.

Will I ever?

Life is hard,
It pulls on my arms, come this way, No! Come this way!
Slowly tearing limb from limb,
Split down the middle, blood seeping out, life seeping out,
What do I serve? That?
Or Him?
The long battle, back and forth,
Thank you, for putting the desire in me,
To fight the darkness, with all my heart,
But, I sometimes doubt, thinking about things,
Will I ever,
Achieve, mature, manhood?

The Coming Dawn.

Why does a man, give up the fight?
Why do people, run from the battle?
Do you not know, we cannot lose?
Go ahead, lay down your swords,
And forget who you’re fighting for,
In this time, of utter most need,
You can’t abandon your post,
You can’t give up hope,
You cannot lose sight, of the prize,
Because, though we fight through the night,
The coming dawn, is the coming victory.

If You Spin.

Spinning around me,
Are the stars, that stain the night,
With streaming light, spin.

He loves You.

Little lamb, new to it all,
You came home to your Dad, and he loved, loves you,
All your darkness, whisked off your back,
So much better did you feel,
But,
Then came along the doubt,
Am I forgiven?
Does Daddy really love me?
I’m not worth anything to Him,
I’ve sinned too much to deserve his love,
Hopeless sinking, deep in your chest,
You think you are hopeless,
You are hopeless, whispers a voice,

You have forgotten, all he did,

I weep tears for your lost heart,
Your Daddy weeps more than any one, he is the one who loves you most,
You have slapped him in the face, and
Screamed, I hate you!
I hate you so much!
You ran away, into the night, your hair streaming, and our tears,
We shoot arrows on your behalf, fighting for your soul,
Against the dark powers of this age,
We will seek you, until we find you,
Because God loves you, and he gave us,
His love,
For you.

Paper.

Masterpiece of a lifetime,
Blank paper, stare at me, I stare at you,
Soon to be, my work of grace,
What could you be, what could I think?
Never, will we know the potential,
Of blank paper.

Pile in a Room.

Burn down to the floor,
And smolder there, as I will watch passively,
My hand of His power, stretched towards a black stack of crusty dust,
Crumble!
Before I finish the word, it lays down to die,
Giving up its futile struggle, impossible to survive in the room,
The room is bare of all possessions, with bare brown walls,
And dim lights, that reveal portions of the shaded wall,
Once again,
The smoking pile, attracts the attention of my eye,
It looks dead,
That’s the mistake that the others made,
As I strike it again, it rears up, and says,
Don’t kill me, I am the secret to happiness,
I am your happiness,
I screamed back,
I hate your ways,
Addicted, Dirty, crusted with death pile,
Be gone from His room,
I struck again,
And killed it.

Swiss Cheese Heart.

Oh my soul, it aches,
Conscience dead, sore head,
Swiss cheese heart, see the other side of life,
Through my heart, are dark shadows cast,
Old band aid heart, they come and go,
I always tear them off, it hurts,
But not as much as the holes,
In my heart, my
Swiss cheese heart.

Where Earth and Heaven Meet.

Endless staircase to heaven, when do you end?
Into the clouds, I tramp, with sweat dripping on my brow, and,
A determination, to beat my body’s will into submission,
Tall giants surround us, but we are not afraid,
I reached the tip, and won, almost, only halfway am I,
Peering out over his land, I am over the world,
My eyes stare into sky, and amaze at the beauty, wide eyed stare,
Outstretched are the fingers of life, that encompass the earth,
Little lakes and streams, all running across the green,
Like an artist’s blue paint dripping across his canvas,
Nothing surrounds me, and I see all,
I am over the world.

Love Life Hate Living.

Man, his blank stare scares, me,
So much are the lies, in front of his eyes,
He can’t see, even evident truth,
All his princes hold him back, from the prize
Tightening grasp, claws all digging in to his back,
Not letting go, are his princes,
Invisible wall, shielding his eyes from the light,
He bows in pain, in addiction, to his gods,
How much does he hate his gods, enough to let go,
But he loves them much, he can’t not,
Love hate life living.

This.

Walk into a new world,
Deep, endless black, speckled with lights,
Nothing is around me, except the night,
And the pines, which grace me their aroma of beauty,
Not one sound, to crack the silence,
I lay down onto the grass, and stare,
At the moon, glowing orb,
And amaze at the God, who created,
This.

Blank but Not.

I’m blank, a stare at the screen,
What to write, but these words?
They don’t mean much,
A small snack for your eyes,
A momentary smile, white showing,
Purse your lips, frown at the fool,
Flood of thoughts, passing through my head,
Too many, to write about,
A fuzzy white screen, each white dot is a thought,
I need to speak, and spill out my thoughts,
Roiling concepts, and boiling ideas,
I ponder them, and stare at my screen,
Now speckled with black,
One thought has been written down,
Many more to pass,
I’m blank.

Life and I. (Edit)

Man is my name
And Life, my friend
And I played a game
Searching for Meaning in his house,
Meaning meaning meaning who we could never seem to find
And His meaning Life’s,
Life and I fool around in his house taking our sweet time
While seeking Meaning,
 Our justification for procrastination came from,
Allday who’s my friend as well--
He told us we have many hours to spare until the search need be began,

All of us buds, spilling out the times like slopping sloshing wine from our glasses,
Which were being emptied endlessly by our thirsting throats and hearts
We desired the highest passion--
What we fancy we will style,
After drinking our fill we went back to
The nonchalant search, where could he be? He meaning Meaning,
Meaning is use, Meaning is truth,
Little did we realize of Allday's lies, 
Time had run out on Life and I--and
At the last second
Allday the scoundrel stole away my Life
After that day I shed many a tear wishing for things to be different--

And after I lost my Life I could not find Meaning
If only someone told where Meaning was  hiding
If only someone cared to rescue me
Life and I would have it.

Inevitable

You stand there, looking like, for trouble,
Brisk walk to my face, tell me off,
Do you not like what I’m saying?
Let me say it again,
You don’t understand yet, and maybe never will,
Aggravating the dark, is what I like,
Bring your best, send your worst,
War will come, death will happen,
Tear and blood will spill over, onto the land,
His eternal fire will wipe it all away,
Inevitable.

Spin that Wheel!

Little teen spiel, spin, spin that wheel!
Play some more, chill some more,
Talk back some more, rolliepollieeyes,
Live it high, live it fast,
Speed time, spin, spin that wheel!
Notimeforyou, only me,
Whine your way, through the streets,
Lies, slander, anger and hate,
Easily provoked, easily popped,
Speaking whatever, sputtering lips,
So many words to say, spin, spin that wheel!
Blow up in my face, spit out those words,
I’ll knock you down, back into your seat,
Where you belong, sitting quiet,
You’re only respected for what you do,
And you haven’t done anything,
Nothing with your life,
Stop spinning that wheel,
Live for God,
And stop saying you love him,
If you don’t.

Beads, Ahead, and Others.

Strapping thrown over, stuck in place,
Lifting up the sack, that holds life of work,
Tightening against his skin, as he bends to lift a rock,
Sweat drips into his eyes, and onto his plot, where he slaves,
Dirt in his fingernails, and dark smudges across his face,
Salty drips, create little clean trails, down his forehead,
All of nature is ruthlessly beating, until the sun starts its sinking,
Tramping trudge, thumping back,
He opens the creaky screen, and lays down weary head,
Rest for his beat body, sleep for his sun dazed eyes,
And for tomorrow.

Thoughts turned to Poetry.

As a Father, that speaks to his son,
Will I speak to you, blessed, blessed one,
Ever so gently, yet, tinged cautioning tones,


Little boys, and little girls,
Little toys, and little twirls,
So little cares, and so little lives,
So little tares, and so little dives,
Big heart, of thought,
Big smile, of joy,
You, the old boy of life,
Might say the smile, is one of not knowing pain, the pain of life,
Uncorrupted clean face, drips small tears,
That I wipe away with my finger,
Wipe away their tears, all in pain, all crying, weeping,
Clutched hands, full of anger, why this?
Small babe, grow up and get scars,
Numb to this world, and it’s traps,
Tragic loss happens, and broken people kill, are killed,

Learn about me, so you won’t die,
I don’t want to you to die,
Why would I create you just to die?
Why would I abandon you to certain fate?
I will take away your needless tears,
Helpless tears, that flow due to hurt,
Listen to me,
I love you.

Hard, Broken, Saved.

Fragile life, tipping it will kill,
Tragic life, loss that breaks,
Cliff life, step towards the fall,
You stumbled, tripped by the dark,
We are carrying you, with all our hands,
All crying out, for your life,
Sweating, working, hoping, knowing,
You will be saved, safe,
Healing life, bring you back,
Death will not take you, nor will the dark,
You will rise, from your bed, and declare,
I have been saved from death, torn from strongman’s grasp,
Sweat soaked sheets, and a dim lit room,
He broke me loose, and now I rise,
Weeping and tears, products of broken living,
Pain and twisted faces, separation from your creator,
His death saved us, his love saves,
Saves all of us.

Tear

The scene of departure, tears stained suits, and wind flapping dresses,
Looking down at the ground,
Coming back, right?
Woman hand in man’s, nose against shoulder,
See you tomorrow, hopefully,
Break your heart, hurt you, death of your love,
When will I see you again?
Little boy begging of mom,
Don’t leave us mommy,
His pleas fall upon deaf ears,
When will this world ever get straight?
When will people start listening?
Break my heart for the lost,
Break it.

Beautiful Love

The pain, the stain, the devil’s whipping cane,
I can’t take the crack, the snap, hit and beat,
Tramping, stamping all over my heart,
Open and bare, everyone poking, everyone staring,
Snotty nose, and festering wounds,
My limbs, only purpose is to be pruned,
Black and blue, throw me down again,
No friends, no one at all,
That’s why he did it, that who he did it for,
You are the man, who Jesus died for,
He came to wipe all things away, off your frame,
You can’t take the pain, the why Jesus stood in the way,
He threw himself down, to save your life,
He was there, to block the arrows, with cross stretched limbs leaking life,
Drip out on the ground, spatter and flow, red pain, made all your dead stain go away,
You love, you love, you love me,
Never stop, always love,
Love that claims,
Blood that saves,
I can’t stop from saying you love me,
I am filled, over the top,
You love is amazing, I can’t stop loving you,
You saved me from the eternal pain, with your beautiful beautiful crimson stain,
I love, love, love you Jesus,
You love me,
This is what you did for me.

Things Once in a Box

Will and try, play in town,
Attempt and control, lay in the swaying grass,
Happen and think, stay in my mind,
Run and sweat, finish hand in hand,
Sway and rock, alike and not,
Where are my friends, where did they fly?
All hiding elusive, shaky shadows seek,
Come home and dwell with me,
Well,
Only half of you.

Invisble Him

Invisible man, dance in my face,
Kick out feet, slap happy hands,
Swinging for attention, singing for praise,
Invisible man, talking to my face,
Spittle flight, anger, spite,
Flashing teeth, tongue between lips,
His language, incomprehensible,
His eyes, scowling down, a frown,
No one sees, no one knows,
Not even him.

Tipping

Tell you love,
Tell me cares,
Tell you sweet,
Tell me laughs,
Show your white teeth, when you smile,
Did we make a mistake? Sudden unintended pain,
Your small hand,
Slips from mine,
No candy coat, to soften the blow,
Your tears dampen my shirt,
As we try, to make it right,
We begin the slow spiral down.

Contest (haiku)

Boy gazing sky high,
At daze fire burning down,
Into their eyes, stare.

Gate

Dirty hands fill my vision, snuffing out my light,
Deep in my head, there is a feeling of suffocation,
I can’t breathe, choking me out,
Break my skin, and batter my bones,
Knock on my head, like someone knocking on a door,
Banging till an answer, pounding inside and out,
Sleepless nights without air,
I wait for it to fade, fade away,
My duty calls me, he keeps me down,
He has been given charge over me,
He will feel the fear, ice fear, heat fear,
He will run, or I’ll destroy him.

Praise

I’m coming back to you,
Leaving behind the old days,
So you can bring to me the new,
Running into your light, that keeps me alive,
Alive in you,
Your hand covers me from the storms of life,
Lead me, where you want me,
Change me now, change me now,
Fill me with your power, I want to love you,
Consume my heart, with your hand,
Carry me home, carry me home,
Use me, send me,
Move my lips to speak your words,
Words that change,
Words of power,
We will serve you to the end our days,
I will die for you Jesus,
Because you died for me.

Selfless

Broken man came stumbling through,
Devil’s breaking, smashing, taking a cracking, at you,
He is doubled over, because the weight of his sins is heavy,
No smiles, no laughter, every pain, every stain,
Bent up face, hurt life living,
I’m never going to make it, says that man,
I will die, and be forgotten,
No hope, no grace,
Why?
Why do I live with all these pains?
A sudden light that brings him back,
His vision is cleared, empty fresh air,
His eyes wander over, things newly cleaned,
Stumbling over a scene,
Scene of blood, scene of unseen selfless love,
Ripped skin on a trembling body,
Jesus gasps for breath, and struggles to survive,
Crimson droplets fall, staining the dirt,
Shaking limbs, stretched back, pinned,
Slow death, hate death, pain death,
You, you put him there,
You look into his eyes,
And he says,
I did this for you,
What will you do for me?

Boy Men

Little boys, yet men,
Grow up, you little big fools,
Take off your men masks.

Happenings

Things happen to me, bad things,
My life is constantly beating me over the head,
I dance into trouble, falling down again, so they think,
It's not my fault, I didn't commit that crime,
Yes you did, says the never listening voice,
The sound of you words drive me to the edge,
I know your wrong, and so do you,
Why? Why does my misery lengthen,
Reprieve would be nice,
Nice to feel,
I only have one hope.

Awe

White wisps float magically above our heads,
As winds play with the sky,
And cotton balls swirl around in an endless blue expanse.

What if?

What if man wasn’t deceived? Broken down to begging knees,
What if man lived their lives, with the true purpose at hand?
What if man had a hope? Death wouldn’t look so good to them,
What if man didn’t wear lust’s chains? They pull him down deeper, deeper, no breaking out,
What if you studied the word if God? You could hear your savior’s voice,
What if man knew about the cost, the cost which was paid?
The blood that was spilt, that spattered the floor,
The torn legs, the rent flesh, bleeding brow, dripping into his eyes,
He took the blows, he took the pain, now you are saved with crimson stain,
What if you spoke the truth to every person you ever met?
Untapped potential slowly slipping through our fingers like sand in the wind,
What could man do, if they died to themselves every day?
What if man knew they were loved,
By Jesus?

Realization

Teacher stands up front casting her gaze
Towards the shiny one piece desks that litter the class room,
Where all of us little sheep sit,
Waiting for wise instruction with intent eyes,
Which the teacher looks into,
And sees innocence.

Walk Away

Cast down face, staring at me,
Truth be told, that is his hope,
I crack, stumble, words don't come,
Smile speed walk, while clown mask being worn,
Good bye young man, I won't see you again,
He died the next day.

Lay Me Down

Lay down to rest my body tells me,
Fatigued and in pain from the constant weather beats,
Is my heart and my mind,
Desire to be with the one,
Is not as strong as the desire to lay my head upon your palm, then sleep,
My muscles are sore, staring through empty eyes at my barely standing pose,
In the mirror, I see my broken body,
Forlorn and ready to quit,
One tear seeps through, it dripped on my shirt,
I will win, someday,
Just not today.

Coming Dawn

Sir Sun turns his back, as Mr. Dark strides up to take his turn,
Light retreats back over the horizon from whence it came, carrying the promise of the dawn away,
Night tucks in old grey men with old grey skin,
Welcomed with open arms is a deserved temporal sleep from the eternal sky stretch, these old men beg for rest,
Beginning of first fresh breath, as Dark puts to bed Sun’s little sprouts,
Little men lights brighten up little men worlds, speaking out in the dark,
But never to be heard,
As sounds of beauty leave hand crafted throats, Mr. Moon borrows partial Sir Sun beauty,
Dark is filling my vision, covering all I know,
Is that terror I feel?
Gloom is coming to my doorstep, fingers outstretched, grabbing, snatching,
Suffocating everything in its empty press grasp,
Light all the candles, and beat out the night,
Flames spring from the hearth into the air, comforting heat meets my skin,
This house hold will have flickering flames that show us life, save us,
And,
They will remind us of the dawn, and the promises his fore coming light.

Sick

Puff blow sigh,
Crack smacked stride,
Up down bang,
Shot slam time,
Toss turn night,
Death comes by.

Burnt

Solid feeling, stuck in my heart,
Stung back to its place,
By its giver,
I’ve seen things, you wouldn’t understand,
Sights that kill my hopeful face,
Maybe I’m wrong,
I’m wrong,
And you know it,
Give me a second chance to act,
Why do you do things?
I want to act maturely,
I do what my blinded heart tells me,
If by chance,
You, the one I know,
Read this message,
Tell me I’m wrong.

Autumn

Flying pieces of beauty’s face, all trailing a gusty current carved in a once empty blue sky,
We watch life’s failing flutter to reach the giver of chance, span a lacking life gap they cannot,
Mr. Wind is spinning all broken colors, faltering and flailing they slowly scrape a frost blanketed earth,
The attempt turns to useless fail, only to entertain my eyes for a mere puff of our visible breath.

Reborn

A light pierced my eyes,
Screams rent from my mouth,
Everything new, terror is all I feel,
A cold grasp stuns my skin,
Hands of protection take me up, they are broken,
So new, yet polluted,
My mind is ignorant, unsuspecting, innocent,
A sense of vulnerability, am I safe?
They will try, try to prevent,
They can only do so much to save,
A sense of inevitability, hangs subliminally,
Keep me far from the rattling chains please,
Did I request something, which I’m not willing to pay for?
Stern words come from safety,
You must work for it, wanting it is key,
I reject my protectorate’s wisdom, I’m the wisest,
I have made myself open, something is seeping in,
Something deathly sweet,
It is new to me, it feels good,
The prince of the world will swallow, if I allow,
Dark crimson temptation, tastes so very sweet,
He is the hunter, I am the prey,
He tricks me with lies, pierces me with arrows of deceit,
Opportunity calls him, I’m giving him the chance,
He is killing me because he hates me,
Tripping and stumbling quickly down a slope,
I feel regret, sick, and painful regret,
My face turns pale, I lift my trembling hands, hands dripping with crimson blood,
How could I do this? There is no reprieve for one so deep,
I wander in the night, a terror hides behind every corner,
Running, running from everything,
I can’t save myself,
Falling, falling, falling down to the black hole filled with all consuming fire,
Trying to find myself,
A bright light speaks against death,
A sudden thought strikes its chord,
It feels like fear to blinded eyes,
Run! My flesh tells me, I obey, it’s my master,
I cannot find peace of mind,
Pride says stay strong,
I hold on to myself, myself,
I am desperate, so desperate,
I Hate, I have so much hate,
I feel fear, a fear of everything,
I obey my hated master, Hated master,
I am controlled by desire, sick desire,
I can’t save myself, my precious self,
What can I do?
Nothing,
I am broken beyond repair,
Again, The Thought plays through my mind,
I attempt to run, I don’t know what I need,
I can’t escape this time,
The Thought,
It tortures my soul, soul so full of holes,
That light, it speaks directly to me, I helplessly fight back,


How does red ink, kill black, and wash paper white?
Giving in to a majestic force, to powerful to conceive,
A blast of white light, blows away dark smudges,
Dark smudges that my broken form could not clean,
My tired body gives in, I’m broken,
Light pours in through every hole, filling me to the brim,
Every bloody oozing Bruise is healed,
I am full of pure love,
I see the truth,
Dark terror of my nights, you are no longer,
Tears of joy flow, emotion that cannot be stilled,
Victory is in sight, victory against the evil one’s plight,
There is still a battle says the light, the enemy is not finished,
Will you fight back?
I will Fight!
The evil one will try to strike your young, pure form down,
Down to the dust of defeat, that is not your portion,
Press on, stop for nothing,
Though it may seem that you will fail, you will prevail,
The true master will lead you,
He gave you tools to win souls,

Words sound through my mind,
I will not abandon you, nor will I forsake you,

All is new, Love is all I feel,
The savior’s hands pick me up, Safety feels good,
I have been reborn,
Inevitability hangs obviously,
We will win.

Yours

I am a swaying tree, swaying in the wind,
Sometimes down, and sometimes up,
I am a weak limb, don’t lean on my cracking bows,
I am the drinker of water, even less do I drink, while my roots run even more shallow,
I am all over the map, I don’t know what I feel many a day,
I am slowly getting stronger, never strong enough,
Trying to be great, trying to be humble,
Then I realize, I’m working against to myself,
I am his son, always under his mercy,
I am a temple, always cleaned by his grace,
I am a warrior, killing terrors in the dark with his light,
I am what he says I am,
My identity is what he defines it to be,
I am yours.

Didn't

Plain faced doll lying on the floor,
Stepped over and stepped on, kicked into a spin across the room,
Little boy, laying in tears,
Little girl, reveling in fears,
Shaping hands work busily,
Working towards full grown,
If changed in my young years had I been,
Many passed pain would not have been,
Laying on the side of life’s road breathing hard,
Never stopping, ever trying,
Red hot metal, can be bent, shaped into something for its life,
Don’t pass time for it to cool, change won’t come easy,
How much easier would
This
Have been,
If parenthood’s hands had shaped me when they could have, should have,
Didn’t.

What am I?

Writing and spelling,
Not happy with my words,
Not sad, just not happy,
I can’t seem to find a pattern in my spinning thoughts,
Random things flying by, distant days that have no plans,
Past hurts, could I put words to them?
Past joys, would you even understand?
Should I even try to write about my life pains?
You probably couldn’t relate,
Write about your life and I about mine,
Emotion cannot have words for all to understand,
Understanding is rare,
I don’t even know my own emotions, what do I feel?
What do I do that others like? What do I do that others hate?
What do I like? What do I hate?
What is my heart focused on?
I want to know what is happening,
Spinning life, I’m all dizzy,
Stop spinning me,
I want to know who I am.

Scened Out

Laughter’s children darting,

Little red bicycle waiting, waiting to be ridden,

Plain school yard, plain house yard,

Grey little woman watches young life scene,

Played out.

You and Your Rosy Cheeks

Beautiful children, protective hands are over your head,
Carefree children, your preciousness goes beyond the horizon,
Little children, I will stand with you forever, I will shield you from death,
You and your rosy cheeks, running and playing,
Sunny day joy,
Smiles express contentment,
Laughs express happiness,
Small chubby outstretched hands, desire expressed, embracing mommy,
Lay down to sleep,
Droopy eyes and drowsy posture,
Innocent little child, sleep, wake,
Small innocent babe, play, grow,
I love you.

Rushed

Much to say, in so little time,
All of my thoughts, put into short phrases,
How can I say, what I want to say?
Please say goodbye to this world of short things, rushed things,
Rushed short things,
Like this poem.

Lovely

Red brick house placed on a hill, all wrapped up in fall brown vines,
Little chimney, spewing black smoke into grey cloud sky,
Autumn cold gusts carry fluttering leaves, all colored beauty hues,
The trees, like frowning old men missing their pride,
Lovely.

Blue Sky Love

Blue sky love, new and fresh,
Never separated, ever joined,
You think to yourself, let our love be strong,
Never passing, ever pressing,
Blue sky, be everlasting,

White day, joy day, musical happiness, light laugh day,
Spinning dancers in pure cloud dresses,
Clean black leading, holding, caring,
Let our love be strong,
Everlasting blue sky,
Never rendered severed, ever tender,
Live you’re to this, 1+1=1,

Long are those romance moments gone,
Blown away are days like chilling fall leaves,
Winter and snow, bitter cold,
Fake love, dressed in smudged costumes,
Placed in the store front, put on their faces,
They don’t know the meaning and action of love,
Old and haggard, broken down,
Worn thin, outside worldly hides,
Our love is different from their biting cold blizzard,
These things press us, but do not affect us,
Blue sky love, old and used,
Never separated, ever joined,
You think to yourself, our love is still strong,
Never passing, ever pressing,
Blue sky, be everlasting.

Written Thoughts

Dear little children, what is the secret to your happiness?
The sanctity of your life dazes my mind,
You are born with innocent eyes, corruption will have its way, someday,
Your conception was arranged before your parents were made,
Your body was shaped by holy wise hands,
Your whole life could be lived to my plans,
Dear little children, what is the secret to your faith?
I don’t believe to my potential, I wish I could,
I love your carefree ways, and your loving hearts,
Your presence calls for joy,
He made you in a holy way,
Parents, do your job his way,
Your babies will live to their full potential,
Late in life, shattered lives will be remade,
Leaders will listen, leaders will change,
You have no idea of your potential power,
Through him.

Peace

Soft strums in the dim light,
Drowsy people wander in night,
Quiet room, candles and wine,
Falling into an unconscious state of mind,
Slipping towards passive state, life will have to wait,
Blank dream stares,
Who are these people that seem to have no cares?
Transfixing things,
Blanc dusty wall,
Faint music is being played,
Lulling me to sleep,
Gentle murmuring voices, dusky shapes cross my view,
Placid faces are telling me things,
I couldn’t say what, I don’t care anymore,
I am untroubled by the stresses of life,
Falling away, from reality,
Falling away,
Goodbye world of worry,
Falling away.

Precious Young Years

I’m an old man,
Staying alive in this house,
I even have a,
Umm, I forgot, never mind that,
I’m living my life like I was the one by which it was bought,
Working at new things, with old man vigor,
Maybe even with a little old man liquor,
I remember way back when,
I worked on things, new things, with young man vigor,
I sit and think, of the great many things I have accomplished,
And the many great things I never did,
Will they follow my trail, I hope not for their sake,
I keep getting off track,
Work, I’m coming back,
What am I going to do?
How will I teach them?
Make the best of your life while you have the chance,
Right now, enjoy your young spring prance, flowering color,
New hearts of carefree happiness,
Use the young years of youth for a worthy purpose,
Cause when you’re thin and frail like this old man,
Your near broken body won’t fit the young person plan,
Use it to its fullest,
I demand it,
Now that I’m done with my rant,
You can now go back to your classes,
Wait,
Would you help me remember where I put my glasses?

Joy Wait

Oh joy to be,
Will you come to me soon?
Or will you stay away,
I lie awake, thoughts about such things come to mind,
Oh happiness,
It could be better with you at my side,
The thought of you has kept me alive,
Do you notice the stress, when you’re not here that I express?
Oh patience,
Waiting is something I’ve gotten good at,
Though at times you still tug at my shirt, or you tug at my mind,
Delicate matters I ponder,
When I think, I know once again, it will be a long time,
Maybe never, due to my inadequacies,
Will you see me fit?
Or will you just pass and spit,
Oh worry,
I know not to,
Harder to say not to than do,
Maturity and adulthood are coming slowly,
You might not come because I can’t handle life,
I will handle it someday, life will cower before this man,
This man will make his dying day stand,
I will make my stand for possession,
Oh coming,
I see you walking,
Someday I will master this life,
I have to wait for joy,
Oh happiness.

Stretching

I am trying but failing, everyday,
Being rid of this burden, is an alien idea to this young mind,
My heart is beaten to a pulp, and a rind,
Do you know that I am here?
You know that I care,
I’m suffering through something I can hardly bear,
I go to the place where I kill myself every day,
I am going there to play, I love this world,
When I come away, the feeling of death and depression overtakes me,
I hate this world, I am under a spell,
Things happen to me I dare not tell,
Life a is spiraling down game, I can’t take the pain,
Crashing down, into a slumber every night,
Thinking about my faults in a hurtful way,
Get up in the morning, go out and do you piece,
Can you not handle the torture?
People die every day, you might be next,
Jumping through hoops for every man to see,
I spit out my heart to you now, will you heed my words?
Don’t follow my path, I can’t shake the death and hurt,
He is there to help, but he’s not there at all,
When will the stretching of my thin body stop?
You can take it, you can press through life with me at your side,
I know,
I just hope I don’t break.

Tomorrow

Heavy hearted, why do you weep?
Life hurts and pains rack me,
You despair because you’re so deep,
You’re deeper than you think,
Growing darkness is creeping its way,
Growing darkness that is already so big,
Slowly pushing you to the brink,
I cannot hold, I cannot stay,
Am I ever going to feel free?
I battle myself again and again,
You are weak, you need to fight,
You just don’t have the will,
You want to be free, but you don’t,
I can’t stop feeling pain,
I’m bent over in misery,
I push it out of my mind to find some peace,
Lay down to sleep and the thoughts some home,
You need to give in, you need to give in to me,
I will, tomorrow.

Crushed Myself

I hear the cries of my dead children,
Haunting my nights and my mind,
It was necessary I said to myself, even though I knew it not,
My life is full of guilt and shame,
Guilty of taking away your potential joy, so I could follow my own selfish ploy,
Guilty of stealing your life, stealing away your life at the edge of a knife,
Shameful of my body,
Shameful of all my inequities,
Attempting to convince myself of conscious easing thoughts,
You wouldn’t have made it anyways,
I saved you from this world of pain,
The suffering would have been too much for you to bear,
In the back of my mind, I know it to all be lies,
Scarred in my heart from this crime,
This crime of mine,
Your little, little dead form, all shriveled and smashed,
I want to throw up, it’s all coming up,
I can’t sleep well, all I do is think about this, dwell on this,
Mommy, why did you push us away? Send us into darkness?
Because I loved you,
They look at me with innocent stares,
They see right through me,
My soul is disheveled, my conscious is tormented by my own sin,
No where’s to run, no where’s to hide from my murdered children,
No excuse.

This World

This world is a taste of hell, everyone is under death spell,
Some people are stoned in their hearts by others,
We can help them, or not even bother,
Spare them, broken people need healing,
Rotten minds and fearful faces,
Broken is this pit, pit of troubles and gloom,
Hardened hearts and crying people, so much hurt and so much pain,
The weeping man, weeping over things that no man should have to endure, we have the cure,
Traumatized children all hiding, fear itself comes to them in the night, demons that bite,
You can’t understand their terror, it is of the devil himself,
This world is full of death, crashing and crumbling lives, ruined lives,
There are none who help, they don’t speak the truth to those who need it most,
When they are judged they will realize the cost,
Layers and layers of dirt and smudges, dead living people and wrecked households,
Relationships between spouses mold,
Cracked trust and ravaged people, running from what is right because they believe lies,
Fatherless children are conceived, this you did not perceive,
They are murdered and thrown in the trash,
What has this world done?
Fire will come and destroy all sin,
His wrath will not be slowed,
He is coming back.

Inspiration

Inspiration doesn’t come unless it wants,
Don’t force it, like me,
I want to write, I want to conjure,
Not many have thoughts similar to mine,
Though, they have thoughts that ring and chime,
Thinking about what I want to write, studying things in their deepest aspect,
Like a child and their carefree ways,
Or their parent who corrects them every day,
A friend who asks a foolish question, I wave them aside,
What are the motives in life?
Why do people do what they do?
Leader acting for all to see,
Acting with good character and impressive stature,
Performing with ease,
Young speaker who tells story, a wise story,
Spelling out what things so they make sense,
Teaching young minds what is right,
Bringing up a generation of Godly men and women,
A person who does little things because they want to,
Do they realize the impact that they cause?
Little feet running all over the floor,
Thumping and bumping,
Smiles and yells,
Laughs that sound like a chorus of bells,
Children.

Author of Thoughts

Author of thoughts, Author of words,
Speak to my heart so that I might understand,
Understand what you have planned,
Put your thoughts on my mind, move my mouth to your written words,
All your enemies will get bitten, they will find I am no friendly carefree kitten,
Make it like a spout, spewing light to all the world,
Gibberish comes out when you aren’t present,
Immediately I resent,
Come to me, and take over all, I give it to you with glee,
Author of actions, Author of life,
Come and kill all my strife,
Write out my life, send it using the mail,
Sometimes I feel like my heart flies through many deadly gales,
Save me from myself, I might stab me in the heart,
Come save all our souls,
Before my novice author self, steals it away, I really want to live your way,
Author of Universe, Author of time,
I always feel so calm, when you have all in your palm,
Write my future, speak it to me, I’ll repeat it back,
Following in a run, you words can be, misinterpreted, crystallize it for me please,
Clear, and clean, spaced and crisp, without any lisp, without any human impediment,
Write, Speak, Think, my life into existence,
I, a broken man, focused on one purpose,
Achieving you.

Joy to Me

Musical notes of joy ring in my ears, quite the opposite of tears,
Heart lifter, heart healer,
Remember those sunny spring bliss days, full of comfort,
A sound of happiness, a sound of peace,
Red and bright, maybe sometimes white,
Pouring from most friends mouths, a delightful jingling,
Joyful ringing,
Being with some is better than others,
Your laughter is music to my ears,
Your person has joy,
Being around you isn’t a grudge,
This no one can destroy,
Your laughter is music to my ears,
Beautiful music.

Empty Shelves

slipping ideas and passing thoughts,
something comes and something goes,
I just remembered, no I didn't,
confused and lost,
the thoughts on are on the edge, the edge of memory,
do I need to think longer, or will it come to me now?
speaking to you, words not coming,
forgotten forever in the vaults of thought,
lost on endless shelves,
the greatest librarians and scribes cannot even find,
oh well,
I will keep reading,
and keep filling those empty shelves,
forgotten.

Words, Minds, Hearts

Hoover dam was recently built, pent up water is gaining potential energy,
Thinking about a matter that distresses, a matter that presses,
Sick to stomach, ill in mind,
Waiting for this to end is hard,
Just wait, then just do,
Are you going to make this a smooth experience,
Or grinding rocks against tender skin, poking things and a stabbing pin,
Will you prepare for that day,
Or will you delay, escape your fate,
Don’t take that bait,
Trust the old man, who says it to be true,
When he was young like you, he didn’t take his cue,
Of course he failed,
Don’t follow my trail, little man,
Little man with powerful ideas,
Strike the emotion chords of your listeners,
We give opportunity,
Your words should be in proper unity,
This self torture is a gift, your words can ring in the minds of many,
Powerful and dangerous is the tongue, like a sword are your words,
Careful where you swing, you aren’t walking in the sun happy spring,
Spoken emotion can change minds, spoken emotion can make enemies,
Pent up wait can hurt, you may have learnt,
Don’t waste your precious words, tell them words, change their minds,
I will change hearts.

Carefree Days

My father once told me, son, don’t go into the friggle where the yammor jiggles,
When I get bigger I will venture into the friggle, no matter what you do, you can’t stop me,
I then scampered off to frolic and play, it was a great day,
Discouraged from my outrageous thoughts was I? Well, they tried,
Teaching and lessons would not help,
For,
This young boy would fight the yammor in the friggle I giggled,
Frowns were shown openly, even by the town glopenly, carefree thoughts I had, they thought this was bad,
But I was just a young cad, dreaming of adventure,
When I turned dop, I climbed mount Hyppa, without their permisher, there I played with the dangerous berisher,
When I returned I was greeted hopingly, I was then lectured openly, by Auldhodot’s Ederls
This, they stated, is absolute folly
You are jolly, and a young cad, but must you go off on sprees, sprees that might break your knees,
Rebellion is what I want, so I ran far away, that’s where I’m happy, staying away,
I lived in the woods all by myself, I was growing mature, slowly gaining stature,
I am a child at heart, a child at mind, soon not to be,
Most people know the older you are, the less fun there is,
Why mull about things that depress, when we could go and play a game of chess?
I started to realize this could not go forever, so I went back, even though I thought never,
I went back to my town, my town Auldhodot, without even a spot, where I grew tall and strait, from a young pup, to a grown up,
I am old now, and look back on my ways, I had fun and I enjoyed all those days, Enjoy yours too,
Use them to their best, this is my request, this is my advice,
You must listen because my age is yours thrice, carefree days playing in the sun, bright beautiful sun,
Those carefree days,
Carefree days.

Sponges

Writing stuff on paper, scribbles and signs, only mean something to the trained eye,
Down the page it will flow, away from the beginning we will go,
Say something one way, another form says another,
Flowing and fluttering words, come off the page and fly into space,
Absorbed by sponges, sponges.

Life of man.

Wet tears land on lost child’s frame, life is not a game,
Fools play in the street, until death steals something precious away,
One moment of carelessness takes a life time to fix,
No likeness should assume, I am immune, to a snake’s deadly perfume,
Go and tempt fate, see what is brings,
He is standing on precipice, he will soon be falling due to one kiss,
Crushed lost ones are not forgotten, they leave scars that are rotten,
I was thinking these thoughts, thoughts spinning through my mind,
Weeping woman, why do you weep?
I killed my babe and now I see,
Winding corners and spinning wheels, end a young fool’ life,
Maybe that’s harsh and even cruel, but,
Is it not reality?
Precious gift of life you’ve been given, you can fight, you can be driven,
I was thinking these thoughts, pondering them much,
Turning them over and flipping them again, and again,
Careful am I, knowing that I'm walking on the thin ice of life,
One push spinning it out control,
Hold it still.

Emotion of his Mind.

Flurry of colors splash across white, dying the blank sheet colorful bright,
Turning plain into beautiful stains, peaceful scene or dying pains,
Flowers of pink to show a scene, lain out in a tasteful fashion,
Full of light, full of passion,
Or not do you fancy, the picture of nice dancing Nancy,
Dark scene of hurt is your sort, man who did wrong awaiting fate in court,
Mothers dripping tears fall on lost precious babe,
World of grudges, world of pains,
Who started this madness, this crazy race of strife,
Young man, it’s the race of life,
Shaken back to his canvas, splashing organized paints into places,
His color taints all of the blank spaces,
Beautiful, dark, hard, bright, still,
Emotion of his mind painted so you won’t be blind, blind to his view,
Emotion of his mind.

Little Ants

Little busy ants run here and there,
Little ants with little scares,
Little ants with little lives,
Little ants with little dives,
Little ants with little cares,
Little ants running into snares,
Little ants with unbendable will,
Why won’t you become still?
Why don’t you care oh little ants?
Go away, we are busy

The Poet

It starts with a prick, a little poke,
It quickly grows and knocks on the door,
Hello?
It runs away faster than you can think,
You can’t rush it in, it comes as it wills,
Slowly coming back is the mind circus, you hear the door creak open wide,
Thinking beyond most minds will ever think, flipping and flopping things burst through your door,
Dancing monkeys and horseplay kids, make chaotic crashes inside you head,
Prancing people and springing signs make no sense to the human mind,
Pleasant popping sounds come to my ears,
A flurry of bright flashing colors all fly and swing by, everything laughing, but why?
Someone pokes me, I looked behind to find a clown,
All colorful and fun, he danced away as night went on,
I ran to catch these crazies in my house, they would surely make a mess of things,
It takes a while to organize a carefree zoo, all those animals on a spree,
A white sheet of paper holds them to my decree,
Working to stick them wherever they fit,
Put them in the right spots, objectionable and relative are the tricks,
When they don’t fit, throw them long, if you don’t you’ll keep hearing them bong,
Whipped into shape by a man, a man with purpose and a duty at hand,
A compelling story to make out of a jumble,
He will write them and he will not grumble, and he will command, that they bow to his every demand,
He is the captain, the thinker, the author,
The poet.

Word Play

Words playing around in the grass,
Like little children they swing and dance,
Over and over again we hear them shouting out in their own voices,
Or maybe they whisper in quiet tones,
Are they far away or close to my ears? Sometimes it’s hard to tell,
The way they are wielded is the key, the key to society,
They are the key to all the minds in the world, for any weak mind like mine will follow what it likes to hear,
Silence.

Everyone and no one.

Swept along on the floor, no one is noticed by anyone, swept away,
The water of society swerves, in and out, in and out,
Breaking tide crushing hearts,
Crumpled thought thrown away, feet that trip are ignored,
Whipped man is not adored, stripped of all when he went to explore,
Welcome does not exist, for those who make fists,
Later, they will have binded wrists,
Sea of pains, come from stains,
Stream of tears, poured forth due to fears,
Heart crushing peers, leave me alone,
Little do you know, you are a guilty child,
Smiles of happiness, smiles of guilt,
Words that curse my ears, life is broken, no one is noticed and no one has love,
Everyone is deceived, and everyone is an angel,
So deceived are they, so deceived.

Anger

Screams knock around in my head, will they ever stop coming?
I feel hopeful before, after I feel as though I am going to hell, these feelings I cannot quell,
The source does not know of the destruction that he makes,
Anger is stirred that is hard the still,
My body is racked with tremors of anger, quaking anger,
I’m whipped without reprieve, leaving scars for everyone to see,
He does it as though it as appeal,
I know that it destroys, I know that my burnt skin will peel,
Every wise man has his faults, why can’t he at least try?
I want know why, I want to pry, even though in the back of my consciousness I possess the answer,
It’s as though I understand, but I don’t,
I fall due to hurt,
I rise with broken bones due to fading pain,
You keep hurting me, just stop,
I weep due to pain, I weep out tears of anger, tears that do not wane,
Little do you know, little do you know.